Nicole has 17 years experience of working within the care sector. Working with the elderly, teenagers and young people with additional needs and challenging behaviour. She enjoys working with children and has always had a passion working with those that require additional support and care. Nicole has extensive training both in safeguarding, ADHD, autism and behavioural issues.
Quietly sat listening to our new cohort of hypnotherapy students in Nottingham putting each other into trance seems today to be quite poignant.
Having realised that six years ago this was me. Taking that first step after becoming a mummy for a second time to join a new course and learn to become a solution-focused clinical hypnotherapist practitioner.
I have often wondered about how people feel about being on their own. Taking time to just be with yourself and enjoy your own company. For a long time I always imagined it to be quite uncomfortable, my own negative brain screaming at me shouting ‘look at that loner on her own, obviously has no friends’. I have often sat and admired people that are just happy to sit and read a paper and have a coffee within their own company and wondering if they have this annoying scenario pop up and shout at them too.
So how do we start to feel comfortable on our own?
When we are in control we have a confidence within ourselves to be able to understand that everything is ok. We are great at making decisions and being able to be our best. More importantly, we can manage our lives knowing that we’re able to do those things expected from us.
When people ask me what I do, there is usually the intrigued view that I can somehow make people do things that they don’t want to, involving a ticking clock and some random words, all from my little consultation room in Bourne, Lincolnshire.
I spend a lot of my time supporting children and adults with their mental health in my practice in Bourne, Lincolnshire and online via zoom, but one thing that occurred to me this week is what about the people around you that support your mental health?
I have spent the last five years at Hummingbird Hypnotherapy as a Clinical Hypnotherapist in Bourne, Lincolnshire. A business that I am very proud of. But, I haven’t always been a Clinical Hypnotherapist. I actually didn’t even plan to be one. It just happened. Then what followed was becoming a lecturer and now a newly qualified supervisor.
February sees us celebrate children’s Mental Health week. Something that many of us myself included are very mindful of at the moment.
I have seen many conversations about how resilient children are and how we must realise that they take things in their stride and they will be ok. For some this is true. For many, the harsh reality is broken routines, environments that aren’t school, social disconnection from friends, limited conversations and most of all limited social interaction. ALL of which we rely on for enabling us to feel good and feel part of something bigger.
I posted on social media this month on my personal journey with burnout and the negative impact it had on my life, showing two pictures three years apart. The point being that looking at them both you wouldn’t see any difference. So how can we juggle it all and manage everything in our day without compromising on our health?
Where do you sit right now with your list of priorities?
When you create that daily to do list, what goes on it first?
I can guarantee it isn’t something for you.
With our ever increasing need and feel to do more, are we becoming more disassociated from those things we need for ourselves. The words self care are banded around everyday but what does it actually mean for you?
The first thing that will always get neglected if things don’t go to plan is the one thing we probably need the most.
” Oh it doesn’t matter ” are those few words that we say to others if we need to cancel, rearrange or just no longer have the time.
Even when you cannot do anymore, you’re exhausted, feeling unwell, the mental punishment and questioning we then give to ourselves is just as stressful as having to stop in itself.
So….. When did you put yourself last on the list?
Who told you that you don’t matter enough to take an evening off, to make time for a bubble bath, to take that walk at lunch. To eat, drink well, look after yourself. Who actually said “you don’t matter so why bother?”
I’ve got bets on, you! You chose to decide you don’t matter. You put yourself at the bottom of that pile. How do I know? Because i’m the same. The difference is that I am slowly make better choices for myself and not others. I am choosing to show up differently and not try and do it all.
So, what can we do differently?
Make things you enjoy non negotiable. Have daily things to look forward to.
Move! When we get ourselves moving forward even if it is one step at a time, we can achieve more therefore having the time to give ourselves some space. Destination procrastination station doesn’t get anyone anywhere.
Plan regular interaction with others. It is really beneficial to talk things out with others so you can find solutions to problems and get a hit of serotonin from being in someone else company.
Take things one step at a time. Being overwhelmed is a sure fire way of forgetting yourself. So take things one task at a time.
If you’re struggling to prioritise yourself right now, get in touch. Clinical Hypnotherapy can really support you getting back on track.
I offer free initial consultations both virtually or in person at my consultation room in Bourne, Lincolnshire. Just click hereto contact me.